Friday, February 16, 2007

Some Shady Jobs I'd Be Good At

Deep in thought lately, I have been pondering the things that I am genuinely good at and/or that I love to do, and how they might be of use to the world. My favorite skills are not widely applicable, sadly, but there are some potentially shady jobs to which they might apply. For instance:

Shredded paper reassembler.
I love jigsaw puzzles, you know. I think, if the government wanted someone to put shredded paper back together, I'd do a good job.

Public eavesdropper.
I don't mean to hear people all the time. But my "cocktail party effect" hearing doesn't really work. If I hear voices, I fixate. I don't have particularly excellent hearing, but for some reason I seem to hear a lot.

Worst Case Scenario creator.
Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. That was my motto all through college. Every time I help at recital, I have a miniature aresenal of supplies, which at times has even included a Break n' Shake ice pack. If I could get money for worrying, I'd be all set.

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